Allen & Ginter: Topps Responds (sort of)

I recently sent Topps an emailing detailing a whole host of problems I had with a recent case bust.  This morning, Topps responded (via email) with:

We are sorry to hear that your recent purchase of a Topps product was guaranteed items. Please note that the policy of the Topps Company regarding the request for missing product items for all current year products requires that the consumer include the following items with their submission:
1) A letter of explanation
2) A copy of sales receipt
3) All pack wrappers & or mini boxes from the product
4) The UPC code (bar code) from the Main box

This should be sent to:
The Topps Company, Inc.
ATTN: Consumer Relations
401 York Ave.
Duryea, PA 18642
ATTN: Consumer Relations
We will then review your issue and begin taking steps toward rectifying it, please allow 2-4 weeks for delivery.

Now, first off, what in the world does this mean?  "We are sorry to hear that your recent purchase of a Topps product was guaranteed items."  How is Topps sorry to hear that THEY guaranteed me items in THEIR product?!  Perhaps they meant "we are sorry to hear you were MISSING guaranteed items."  That makes a whole lot more sense (and also is a much stronger statement of wrongdoing on Topps' part I might add).  Obviously, I'm not impressed.
 
However, I will be packing up all the stuff that Topps requires, a full report of what (if anything) Topps does about it will be posted on my blog - most likely in 2-4 weeks (their words, not mine).